Hi All, Just looking for some help writing a good hook. Are there any rules that you follow or advice you can give? I know mine is too long probably, but this is what I have:
When new girl Raina Temple and her crush Tyler Sturdy discover a stack of notebooks with instructions for programming a computer to control people’s minds, Raina doubts such a thing is possible.
Thanks!
Jen
Thank you so much! I've tried many versions. I came up with this as an alternative to what I had.
When formerly-obese RAINA TEMPLE and her friends mistakenly kill someone with the mind-controlling software they discover, Raina must summon the courage to do what’s right even if it means being alone again.