Hi everyone. This is my first #PitMad. Thank you so much for all your help. This experience could be daunting, but the prep for it so far has been great. I'm only working with 2 pitches this time around.
1.
Up to her Rolex in debt, Victoria inherits her estranged mother’s restaurant. The valet’s always drunk, the chef conspires with an imaginary friend, and the manager wants to backstab Victoria with a steak knife.
If they weren’t her siblings, she’d axe them.
*NOTE - originally for the last line I had 'she'd fire them' but someone earlier mentioned it wasn't strong enough to keep up with the first paragraph. Thoughts on this? Thanks!
2.
Thrown together by tragedy, five feuding siblings attempt to raise their dead mother’s restaurant from the grave.
When they discover their mother was oven mitts deep in criminal dealings, hangry customers are the least of their worries.
I really appreciate all your help in advance! Good luck to everyone!
I love the language choices in #1. I like the plot elements in #2, which I think offer a bit more story than #1 (the criminal dealings). I think either of these could work...I don't have any ways to make them better. But they almost seem like different stories. With that said...that's not a BAD thing necessarily, as you could catch the eye of an agent with either, depending on which resonated with them. In the old days, before a million people did Pitmad, I'd have told you to pin one of them and then use the other in the Pitmad feed. And that's probably still good advice, though I don't know that agents have enough time to look at individual twitter feeds. Overall, Nice job.