Hi all! I have three pitches so far for my adult fantasy romance. There are different styles to look at and any advice is great! TIA!
(1)
When Ariadne, a victim of war, marries Azriel, his secrecy about his family bloodlines prompts suspicion. If she discovers the truth, she’ll leave and the daemons he’s trying to protect her from will finish what they started. #PitMad #A #R
(2)
Ariadne and Azriel have one thing in common: they’re victims of a war against daemons. After marrying, Ariadne’s curiosity about her husband’s bloodlines grows, but he’ll do anything to keep his secret. If he fails, he’ll lose her and the daemons will end them both. #PitMad #A #R
(3)
BLACK DAGGER BROTHERHOOD x RADIANCE
A brutal war. A loving marriage. A devastating family secret. If the truth is discovered, the marriage will end, and the war will be lost for Ariadne and Azriel. Can he keep her from learning the truth and save them both? #PitMad #A #R
Ah! I rewrote them again with a couple other versions, too. Perhaps these are more clear? I kept daemons for now, but we'll see if that sticks...
When Azriel proposed to Ariadne, he swore to protect her from vengeful daemons, but after his bastard bloodline causes uncontrollable jealousy, he fears she’ll uncover his secret. If she does, she’ll leave and the daemons will kill them both. #PitMad #A # F #R
When Ariadne accepted Azriel’s hand, she had no idea the lengths he’d go to protect her from vengeful daemons, but after jealousy gets the better of him, she blames his bloodline. The truth about who he is could ruin their marriage and get them both killed. #PitMad #A #F #R
BLACK DAGGER BROTHERHOOD x RADIANCE
Ariadne and Azriel are being hunted by vengeful daemons, but their marriage has a bigger threat: his impure bloodline. If she learns who he really is, he’ll lose her trust forever - giving the daemons exactly what they want. #PitMad #A #F #R