Hi and thanks for doing this! Here’s my main “stakes-y” pitch:
WAR GIRLS X SLIDERS
Innovation. Prosperity. An end to all suffering.
The multiverse is built on a lie.
And Zoe bought it, until she tripped into a doomed dimension. Now she and its refugees must escape before an evil oligarchy traps them there forever.
#pitmad #a #na #sff #poc #own —————-
Since we get two more pitches per manuscript, my others focus on other elements of the story that are intriguing or a little trope-y. I’d love to know what you think of that approach:
WAR GIRLS X SLIDERS
2067. For a fee, Glimpse your life in an alt dimension.
Zoe envies her alt selves for all they have: Good skin. A nice apartment. A living mother.
Then a Glimpse comes from a world under siege.
Mom’s alive there, too.
But for how long?
—————
WAR GIRLS X SLIDERS
Zoe shouldn’t be trapped in an enemy dimension.
She shouldn’t be helping its people escape their dying world.
And she DEFINITELY shouldn’t be falling for their Commander, who happens to be her boyfriend’s alt universe doppelgänger.
Oops.
————
THANKS!!
These are pretty good as written. All of them. I like the second two the best. The first one is a bit generic, so if you could find a way to add a bit more detail it might help. When I say it's generic, I mean that it could apply to a wide range of stories...what makes yours unique? (The alternate dimension is a good piece, but 'an evil oligarchy,' for example, could be a lot of books and 'escape' is pretty generic. (Don't get me wrong...it's not a BAD pitch. But it may be one that gets passed over as 'a lot like other stuff.') Also, there's no need to hashtag NA. No agent is looking for NA, so you can save those characters for use elsewhere. While you *can* hashtag SFF, I'm not sure that's a criteria somebody would use to filter, as it's so broad.